So many people live in the past, holding onto what went wrong & reliving how it made them feel. Also their minds worry about the future, catastrophising about what might happen.
Our minds try to make sense of the past & protect us from the future. However, all that happens is we relive the past over & over again, then we do not understand why we cannot let it go. We worry about all the things that might happen, to find that none of them actually did. So we had all that worry for nothing!
Does this sound familiar?
Living in the now & being fully present fills you with the joy of what is in front of you. Really engaging with what you are doing without distraction of the past, the future & your phone is the only thing that is truly real.
Of course look back and relive the good times. Think about & plan your future, so life runs more smoothly.
Just don't get caught up in overwhelming thoughts that rob you from living your best now!
If you need help letting go of your past or to stop your constant worry, please contact me to arrange a free, no obligation 30 minute initial consultation.
Your little voice tries to provide you with a sense of security, as well as keep you safe and comfortable with your surroundings. If things change too much around you, your little voice sounds an alarm. It will say no, step on the brakes and do what it can to shut you down. Your little voice doesn’t want change. Above all, it needs to be right. This is because being right means you’re safe and secure. Unfortunately there’s a problem with that, as being right is an illusion.
When feeling threatened, your little voice creates fear. It wants things to stay the same and knows that fear freezes flow. It will call on your subconscious fears so you won’t even know why you are afraid to move forward in your life even when you have a strong conscious desire to do so.
Your little voice is nothing more than a collection of automated and habituated patterns of thought. These eventually became distorted glasses that we perceive reality. These glasses tend to disempower rather than empower you. The biggest problem is you don’t perceive what you see through these glasses as filtered perceptions, you perceive it as reality itself!
The worse part is you start experiencing your little voice and the way you see life through your glasses as reality, the way you really are. You then put your trust in the rules that the little voice echoes, thinking that you are trusting yourself and give up your identity and dreams.
If you don’t take control over it, your little voice will destroy your emotional life piece by piece. This is because emotion is the fuel for your entire life, it will effect your relationships, your career, your health and what you want to do with your life.
The good news is you do not have to fall prey to it. It’s time to silence it. Tone it down and quiet it. Hypnosis is a great way of doing this. Using hypnosis daily gives your mind time to calm down and feel more confident. Also working with a hypnotherapist you can work through what your mind is holding on to, which in turn will quieten your little voice and help you see clearly through your glasses of life.
Life is 10% of what happens & 90% of how you react to it. In life, attitude is everything; it is what shapes our beliefs & our desires. Tough times will happen throughout our lives, but it is up to us how we interpret them.
Many people blame their circumstances for their shortcomings & as a result accept the harsh reality of their situation. These people believe an event is equivalent to its outcome; however, for some adversity is where they thrive.
People who succeed realise it is not what has happened to them in their lives, but the manner in which they react to these events. The way a person decides to respond to situations is what will shape their feelings, actions & results.
We can choose to live the life we want, no matter how tough it can get. It is all a matter of mentality, only we will prevent ourselves from achieving greatness. The rest are just small detours before we reach our destinations.
Adversity is something that everyone faces at some point in their life. These difficult times however are not what define us, but the way in which we react to them is. Anyone can be defeated when life does not go as planned, but the strong survivors are the people who can overcome such hardships.
Knowledge comes from everything we do & what happens to us. We learn valuable lessons based on our experiences & the ways in which we react to them. Every hardship presents an opportunity, we just need to recognise that instead of letting it defeat us. Your thoughts & attitude change your experiences & shape your life.
You have a choice when it comes to reactions & although in the moment, you want to get angry, you need to actively remind yourself why it would be detrimental.
You always have a choice of how you are going to respond to what the world offers you. Do not let something dictate the way you react to things. You need to look within yourself & realise that you have the power to make things happen. We are a sum of all of our life’s experiences, so use these past lessons to help better your life in the now!
If you need help in letting go of past events that are holding your back, or have a fear or phobia that prevents you living the life you desire, hypnotherapy can help you. Give me a call or email me to see how hypnotherapy can help you.
It’s important to learn to love yourself, because if you don’t love yourself it will be hard to accept that others love you.
Loving yourself should become your highest priority if you wish to create a truly happy future. I’m not talking about loving yourself in a self-centred, egotistical way. I’m talking about loving yourself by embracing your uniqueness and what shows up in your daily life.
Unfortunately low self-esteem prevents your personal growth by restricting your concept of yourself. You may never reach your full potential if you entertain recurring thoughts of low self-esteem.
Here are 6 ways to reconnect with yourself and develop a stronger relationship with who you really are:
As humans we desire personal growth. To enable yourself to grow it is vital that you understand yourself and know what makes you happy. Most people are more aware of their flaws than their skills, however remember nobody is perfect . You cannot have light without shade, get to know all of you. Remember you are just as important as anyone else and you should be the driver of your own life’s journey.
Stop Criticising Yourself
Criticising yourself will get you nowhere really fast. Would you talk to your friends the way you talk to yourself? People who practice self compassion are more successful and have a healthier outlook on life.
Embrace the Positive
When you entertain positive thoughts, you become kinder towards yourself. Your self love and self-esteem increases, along with kindness towards yourself and others. Everyone is born positive, it’s simply the environment that shapes each individual. You still have a choice to embrace the positive, nothing is carved in stone unless you give it power and permission.
Worrying uses up vital emotional energy which could be channelled into joy and happiness. The more you entertain worrying thoughts, the more you establish worrying as a habit. Remember 97% of what you worry about never happens. Set your worries aside as they are holding you back from your true potential.
We all make mistakes at some point in our life . Holding on to your mistakes by thinking negatively about yourself will not allow you to live the life you deserve. Learn to forgive yourself by practicing detachment, trust that whatever happened in the past is in the past! Move on and appreciate the lessons gained from your experience by seeing it as an opportunity to gain knowledge and resilience to be the best version of you.
Gratitude entails being thankful for what you have right NOW. Being grateful does not mean comparing yourself to others who are more or less fortunate than you. It is being thankful for the small things in your life, the people in your life and that you get another day to live your life.
Be the person who you love and respect, be someone who makes YOU happy!
We can be our worst critic. This is because we naturally have a negative bias towards ourselves. This means we give more weight to our flaws, mistakes and shortcomings than our successes. This self criticism can take a toll on our minds and bodies. It can lead to continuous thoughts that interfere with our productivity and health.
Basically, beating yourself up does not support growth, motivation and positive change. We need to develop an approach of self compassion and a willingness to let go of what is holding us back and weighing us down.
So how do we do this?
The first step is to make the choice that you will at least try to be nicer to yourself. Commit to treating yourself more kindly by letting go of self judgment, go easy on yourself and practice self compassion.
The next step is to meet your criticism with kindness. If your inner critic says, ‘You’re lazy and not worthy,’ respond with ‘You’re doing your best’ or ‘You're more than enough.’
The last step is the most important step if you want self compassion. It is to make a deliberate, conscious effort to recognise the difference between how you feel when caught up in self criticism, and how you feel when you can let go of it.
Try to think about it this way - how much better might you feel if you take a deep breath after making a mistake, rather than berating yourself? Then think to yourself what would you say to a friend if they were in the same situation?
If a friend said, ‘I’m feeling lazy and not worthy.’ You wouldn’t be hard and mean to them, you would be kind and helpful. You would explain that they are enough and they did their best.
Treat yourself as you would a best friend and don’t be so hard on yourself.
Be kind to yourself as you deserve your love too!
We have to make countless decisions every day. Every action we take is a decision to not take another. Whether it’s to get up early or late? Have porridge or toast for breakfast? Go for a walk or sit and watch TV? Look for another job or stay in a job? Move house or not? Our lives are shaped by the decisions we make!
Every day, we make hundreds of decisions. Whether small or large our decisions can change the way we live the rest of our lives.
When we decide to watch TV, we are deciding to take time away from whatever we dream of doing. Maybe it’s to start a business, lose weight, or learn a new language. Whatever it is, you are taking time away from your dreams if you decide not to take action towards them.
If you decide that you are someone that gets up early every morning, you have decided that’s the type of person you are. Even if you have a very late night and the alarm goes off early you have already decided what type of person you are and you do not sway you from your decision.
Some people live their life without making any real decisions. They are like a piece of driftwood in the ocean, floating to wherever the current brings them. Therefore they end up with whatever direction the environment throws at them.
No one becomes overweight overnight, if you decided to over eat today, you won’t be overweight tomorrow. If you decide to over eat tomorrow, you still won’t be overweight the day after. But if you decide to over eat day, after day, after day. It’s hard not to become overweight over time.
We can’t completely control how our decisions affect the outcome. What we can control is the decisions we make on a regular basis as that is what truly shapes our lives.
Making the decision to see a hypnotherapist could help you with the issues you are dealing with. It could be a decision that will shape the rest of your life.
What are you going to decide today that will shape your future?
Are you struggling with what is going on around you?
Do you find the changes in our world and the new 'normal' difficult to cope with?
Are you finding that you feel stressed and anxious a lot of the time?
The issue is that it's impossible to have control over your environment and therefore the more you try the harder life seems to get.
The easier route to a calmer, happier you is to make the changes you need inside your head.
Hypnotherapy is an amazing tool to make the shifts you need in your mindset to cope with everyday life, feel more confident and improve your self-esteem.
If you would like to discuss how hypnotherapy can help you please either call me on 07875 652338 or email me on email@example.com
Whether you realise it or not, each day you set the standard for how other people treat you!
You may not be consciously aware of this, most of us aren’t, but nevertheless, the standards you have established serve as guidelines for how you are treated in life. To most of us this may come as quite a surprise, but whether or not you’ve intentionally defined standards for what is (or is not) acceptable in your life, you nevertheless have them. Furthermore they are communicated to the world around you on a regular basis.
It is human nature to focus on the poor behaviour of other people for our problems, so the point needs to be made that teaching people how to treat you, begins with you, not them.
It is important to remember the way you treat yourself sets the standard for others. For example; if you are always putting the interests and well-being of others first it might make you feel significant and wanted, however it teaches the people around you that your needs aren’t as important as theirs.
If you want to generate change that is meaningful and sustainable, you need to first recognise how your own behaviour contributes to the way others treat you. You can’t teach people how to treat you if you haven’t taken the time to clarify your standards for your life. You are responsible for communicating your standards clearly and respectfully, however you are not accountable for how others receive or interpret it, nor for how they feel as a result.
Create a plan of action for what will happen when your boundaries are crossed. Gently let people know when you feel your boundaries are not being respected. Most people will mean no harm, and may simply be used to behaving in a certain way and are unaware of the impact their actions are having on you and other people around them.
There are going to be people who test your efforts and a few who will outright ignore your requests. Before assuming the other person is disrespecting your boundary, step back and be really honest with yourself about how you communicated your standard in the first place. Were you clear, or was your message left vague in the hope they would just somehow get it so you could avoid the discomfort of being up front?
The important thing is not to let it continue because they will see it as a sign you don’t take your own boundary seriously. This is where you need to have clearly defined consequences and be prepared to follow through.
Taking responsibility for defining the life you want to live and teaching others what is acceptable behaviour toward you is the ultimate exercise being treated the way you want to be treated. It’s about living your life with full intention; making smart choices and exercising your personal power and authority to achieve greater freedom, happiness, and long-term life happiness.
In the beginning, it’s going to be tempting to revert to old behaviours, however keep reminding yourself that there’s a big difference between being accommodating and not respecting who you are.
We are all getting used to a more virtual world due to Covid 19. The good news is hypnotherapy can be provided online. It’s convenient, easy to access and just as effective as working face to face.
We are all now becoming more accustomed to meeting people online via applications like Zoom, Skype or FaceTime. Recently, I have been seeing all my clients online for their hypnotherapy sessions.
I have been asked if online hypnotherapy is as effective as face to face hypnotherapy? Also if hypnosis works online? Well, I can tell you from experience that my answer to both these questions is yes!
Here are the top five questions I have been asked about online hypnotherapy, which you may find useful if you are thinking about hypnotherapy.
1. What is online hypnotherapy exactly?
Online hypnotherapy is a safe and convenient alternative to face to face sessions. It is just as effective and follows the same structured approach. It’s very useful due to the restrictions of Covid 19. It is also useful if you are restricted by time, location, or medical conditions, therefore making it accessible to all.
2. Is online hypnotherapy as effective as face to face hypnotherapy?
Absolutely. Online hypnotherapy is just as effective, there is no difference. Some people find they are more relaxed and comfortable when they are in their own home, which can only add to the positive outcome as we work together.
3. Can hypnosis really be done online?
Hypnosis doesn’t rely on having a therapist in the room with you. We all go in and out of a hypnotic state, also known as ‘trance state’ several times a day. For example, watching a good film or reading a book, and we find we completely lose track of time. A trance state is a very natural and safe state where you’ll remain in complete control and can be easily achieved as long as you hear the hypnotherapist’s voice.
4. How does hypnotherapy work on Zoom?
Using Zoom for virtual hypnotherapy sessions couldn’t be easier. You will need a reliable internet connection and a quiet, comfortable place to relax where you will not be disturbed. Once we have agreed a time for your session, I will send you a unique link for each session which is safe and secure and only you will have access to it. You can use a laptop (with a camera), tablet or phone to join your session. All you need to do is place your device in front of you so I can see your upper body and face. I will then guide you into ‘hypnosis’, a state of focused attention where your mind is more responsive to positive suggestions.
5. How do I know online hypnotherapy will work for me?
Online hypnotherapy is just as effective as face to face therapy. It’s important that you choose the right therapist for you, someone you feel comfortable talking to and trust. This is why I offer a free initial consultation online which gives you an opportunity to meet me and ask any questions you many have. If you really have a desire for change then hypnotherapy online can help you get from where you are to where you want to be.
Hypnotherapy can help you with so many issues that you are trying to deal and cope with; anxiety, stress, weight loss, phobias, smoking cessation, confidence and self-esteem, past events that you find hard to let go of. You do not have to feel the way you do, we can work together to help you feel the way you want to. If you’d like to have a free, no obligation initial consultation to explore if hypnotherapy with myself is a good fit for you, please contact me.
At the moment and over the last few months most people’s lives have been an uphill struggle. This is mainly because our everyday lives have had to change so drastically. We have had to adapt to deal with being furloughed, home schooling, isolation, not being able to see and hold our loved ones, queuing for our food shopping etc…
As we are creatures of habit and let's face it, we took our lives for granted, this has pushed us way out of our comfort zones. Also all these changes and the constant bombardment about covid 19 in the media has been stressful and worrying for most people. However we can adapt and change, we are stronger than we think, we have had time to actually think about what we really want in our lives.
So many of us have managed to live without all the extra material things we constantly brought to make us feel ‘happy' and to keep up with our peers. Yes life has been difficult, but it has been simpler at the same time. We have managed to spend more time with our immediate family, which is what most children want more than anything. We have used technology to contact family and friends, and in a lot of circumstances spoken to friends whom we have not been in contact with for a while. We have actually had time to talk, listen and catch up via Zoom, Skype or phone.
However for a lot of people on the frontline; doctors, nurses, care workers, ambulance drives, emergency services, shop workers, transport workers etc their uphill struggle has been very different. With some not seeing their family for weeks to protect them, working long hours, facing their fears about the virus and doing it anyway. They have had a very steep uphill struggle.
As the saying goes ‘we are in the same storm, but we are all in different boats!’ Let’s hope the storm will start to move away and we can get to the top of the hill and take in the wonderful views. After all the changes we have had to go through we will see our view very differently, we will not take everyday life for granted, we will see that happiness is from inside us and not what we can have or buy. We will love the people in our lives more and tell them how much they mean to us.
Just think what your life will look like if we take on board all the lessons over the last few months and see more clearly the view from the top of the hill!
I've been a full time hypnotherapist and mind coach for over 12 years. My unique approach to therapy is client centred and I aim to educate and empower my clients to enable them to make positive choices and changes in their lives.